I hate cold rainy days

I didn't let William play outside today because we had more rain than snow. I am now paying the price because he is whiny and bored. We are going out to dinner with friends - their daughter just got admitted to MIT. William doesn't want to go, he doesn't want to try Thai food (even white rice) he wants someone to play with ....

Ok, i didn't get much done today, and I spent a long time on the couch with him watching TV - I understand that he's bored but leave me alone for 5 minutes!!!!

Arrgh - it is compounded by the fact that I offered him several different things to do this afternoon (making cookies with me, eg.) and he declined them all.

Forced exercise!

Well, I'm a little proud of myself. We got about 9 inches of snow. Steve's away. The only chance I have to clear it is when the kids are sleeping. So, having never used the snow blower before, I learned how and cleared the driveway. It's kind of a beast to meneuver and manage the direction of the snow while working on our hill of a driveway, but I did it! And then followed up with a good scraping with the shovel and salting (our driveway is steep and impossible to get up with any amount of snow or ice on it.) Yes, the house is still a disaster (and -- gross -- there's been cat barf on the carpet in my office for 2 days) but I'm glad to know that I can do the things I need to, even on my own.
Of course, I just found out that school for Owen is cancelled tomorrow morning, so it's less urgent that I be able to get out first thing, but I still have places to go! I wonder if Sierra's gymnastics is cancelled....

One load down! Many more to go

I got one load out of the storage unit. It at least made a difference in the storage unit. There are many more loads to go but I am counting it as exercise!

Just a little more than yesterday....

I'm alone with the kids this week, and sometimes I use that as an excuse to not get anything done. But this week I've resolved to go to bed each night with the house a little cleaner or at least a bit more done than when I woke up in the morning. Yesterday that wasn't hard, given that the house was a disaster when I woke up, but I did manage to clean all the old condiments out of the fridge and wipe down the downstairs bath before going to bed. Plus, the kids and I did manage to get the Christmas tree decorated! They were actually a big help! Now if I can at least get the candle lights in the windows the neighbors won't think we're the Grinch family. Anyway, I've got so much to do around the house, if I can keep up this goal of just a little more each day, even after Steve gets back, perhaps it will eventually all get done! And if my house cleaning and to-do's get under control, perhaps I can feel relaxed enough to stop and exercise once in a while!

Bummer

Went back to the surgeon's office today to get the steri-strips taken off my incision. Apparently I got it wet, or keeping it covered made it too moist, because the skin layer hasn't healed all the way yet. She said it looked good except for the outer layer, so I have to put Bacitracin on it twice a day and either leave it open or if I wear a sock I can put a gauze pad over it (held in place by the sock). Right now I'm wearing socks - its cold, and the hem of my pants was rubbing it.

It's cold and rainy and gray and matches my mood, I'm afraid. The incision is tender, probably because she broke the scab, and I'm feeling very sorry for myself. I'm tired of being "broken". I want to be able to do all the things I need/want to do, and right now I feel like I can't. And this is just the biopsy site, we haven't even gotten the results yet! Oh, yeah, there's a reason we mutilated my leg.

I don't know if I'm going to get presents out to family before Christmas - I bought them, but have not wrapped let alone shipped anything. I know, they'll understand and its hardly the first time, but I really want to get done on time. For once. And I need to clean up at least some because family is coming, and I'd like to bake cookies (another cookie exchange on Sunday, now), and the tree still has no ornaments.

Bleah. I know at least half my mood is the weather - I guess it's a good thing I don't live in Seattle, eh?

Well...

Should be an interesting week. I get to call and change my appointment with my Dr. My cholesterol results were high so they want to see me to talk about my results. I don't know what they are yet as they didn't say in the message they left. To top it off they keep leaving messages on the phone I've asked them not to leave messages on and never approved for messages. Rather annoying.

I've had higher cholesterol since getting married. I know I've also gained weight since marriage as I cook every night and eat full meals, vs when I was single I would sometimes have peanut butter and crackers and call it good. More fun to cook for two, but there are some drawbacks.

Hope everyone has a better week then it sounds like it was last week.

On the upswing

I'm really hoping that no more bad things happen, for at least a few days. It's been a really rough week. My leg, my teeth, my poor cat... that's three, right? I'm done for a while?

I'm actually feeling pretty good despite everything, and I've realized I've lost 12 lbs. since May without doing a whole lot on purpose. I'm trying to choose healthier foods and be mindful of when I'm eating for hunger vs. eating emotionally. I don't necessarily NOT eat just for therapy, but I'm trying to be aware of it and realize that's a choice I'm making.

Exercise is going to be a while away, I think. Walking isn't too bad, but when I step wrong it's like little electric shocks radiating into my foot. The incision doesn't hurt much, it's the nerve pain from the severed nerve that's getting me. Even pushing on the wrong place on my leg will trigger it. John was poking around trying to figure out where the numb patch is and hit a spot that just lit me up, and it wasn't particularly near the incision. The nurse says that will improve with time, but it's wierd now.

So today I let myself eat what I wanted (fish and chips for lunch, golden fried goodness!), but I also walked around the mall for quite a while and took the stairs between levels twice. If I can keep making the better choices most of the time, maybe I can make progress.